dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
