okay pat passed out under dana's car
I looked at my own cervix.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
