Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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