So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
