Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
