"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize