you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
handjob tips. give me some.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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