so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize