Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
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