Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
