How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Randomize
