I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
