as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
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