Me too!
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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