Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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