id be glad to
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
