lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
