i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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