I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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