Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Randomize
