We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
