So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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