i jhust puked up my retainher.
i think my tv is drunk
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
