there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
