Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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