He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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