lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
