my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Randomize
