the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
