just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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