Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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