well you can't waste a boner
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
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