Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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