I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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