omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
