thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
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