Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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