It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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