the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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