hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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