You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
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