he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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