oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
