you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
