I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
