is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize