nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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