I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
