Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
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