I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Randomize
